Wednesday, October 31

which is spookier?

While I looked through my facebook photos for Halloween pictures I realized that the "ghosts of Halloweens" past were not nearly as scary as the outfits of Bailey's high school past. Seriously frightening. It's Halloween so I ought to share some of my past Halloween costumes but maybe share some outfits that could easily be mistaken for Halloween costumes as well. Sort of embarrassing but totally not because I give about as many fucks now as I did when I was wearing that shit (zero, give or take). All of my Halloween costumes sucked. I never had enough money to buy an actual costume and even if I did I was (or at least I feared I was) too fat to fit into anything I liked. Hence the shittiest costumes on the planet.

Halloween 2011 - Jungle Kitty!

Halloween 2010 - Snooki
Halloween 2008 - Dead Prom Queen 

Halloween 2007 - ????

Halloween 2006 - GI Jane

Decently lame costumes..but here is where it gets interesting. I should have played a game so you could guess which outfits were Costumes and which weren't. It would be tricky! But now I'm over halfway through the post and too lazy to attempt that game so coulda, shoulda, woulda.! Here are some of my outfits that should have been halloween costumes. 

 Happy Halloween! What are you Bailey? A Hobo?
 No, bitch. It's not Halloween, itsSeptember &.I'm just dressed like this laying in the road like every other normal 14 year old out there............
 At least I'm not alone here, Tam and Di looked equally as foolish, but I kidd you not - we were headed to a basketball game. Why did I need a headband like that? Who knows. I believe I was wearing mesh gloves, a plaid skirt and mid calf black and red lace up boots as well so.. who knows what I was thinking.
 Can't get together for a girls baseball game without dressing like a baseball playing smurf on crack can I? WHAT THE FUCK?
Just a regular day.. dressed like a candy shop threw up on me. 
Wore this outfit to a music festival. That's normal. Not only did I wear this outfit in real life but I wore it for like 4 days straight. So not okay.

Honestly, my regular every day outfits were scarier than any Halloween costume I've ever pulled off or even seen on someone else. Since my costumes aren't particularly amusing I thought I'd share with you some good Halloween posts to check out on this lovely Halloween. Tonight I'm being pretty adult and not celebrating but I hope everyone has a happy and safe Halloween.

Big Love,
Bailey J

Check out Ty's transition into doing the "cute halloween" thing at Arkansassy 
You have to see the coolest costume I've seen all day at Alex's blog If's, Ands and Butts
While you're there make sure to vote for her in the Inspire Language Learning Blogger Competition 
Neelys Teen Mom costume made me chuckle at A Complete Waste of Make Up  
Doggies in costumes are funny so check All In My Twenties and Fantastically Average to see Kristen and Jessicas puppies in Halloween get ups!

Tuesday, October 30

Life With A Moo

How is everyone feeling after Thursdays bomb dropping?! I'm feeling much the same, I'm sure lol. 

Mark is my first real boyfriend. I say real because I'm pretty sure when I was 8 I dated Millan and when I was 13 I had a boyfriend who i didn't speak to for about 2 months but other than that I've never had a real relationship. He is my first love and the first guy I've ever "lived" with. Lucky guy, eh?

So for the most part I spent 21 years being single. I spent the last 10 months being basically single. Some would argue single is better and there are definitely perks but right now I'm quite enjoying the awesome perks that come with having a boyfriend. Everything is so new and different and pretty awesome.

I've compiled a list of perks of having a boyfriend and "firsts" I've had so far. To some people this is normal and it's weird that I would notice but I've never had anyone and this stuff is pretty fucking wicked for me.

  • I always have someone to scratch my back.
  • I'm not so alone all the time.
  • I get to fall asleep in someone's arms.
  • I sleep so much better with someone next to me.
  • I met his family and almost shit my pants.
  • Two words - back massages!
  • He cooks for me (hes such an awesome cook!)
  • I have a buddy for anything I want to do.
  • I have my own place for the first time.
  • I'm pretty much a housewife lol.. not really but its weird. 
  • I have a reason to take care of myself. Showering once a week is a thing of the past. 
I wish I could make a longer list but I'm headed downtown with my boyfriend.. oh yeah..and I get to say "my boyfriend". Actually being able to talk about him and admit to being in a relationship isn't so secretive and weird anymore.. it's just my life. And it's awesome. No more double life.. feels good.

I'm doing great here in Sacramento and I think Mark is doing okay too..he seems to like me alright. We'll see after a few more weeks when I get into "I'm so comfortable I will fart around you" mode.. he might not find me so adorable then.

Thanks to everyone for all the support. I love you guys so much and I am so happy I finally let everyone in on the secret world of Bailey and Moo. Ooh yeah..that's Marks nickname which I will prob refer to him as for the rest of my life on here.. poor Moo.

Big Love,

Thursday, October 25

& you thought I was single part 2.

My following count went down by three so I figured I better write a blog before I lose you all. Not really, I know many of you are a bit more loyal than that, but I really do need to write a blog. I promise that now that I'm in California I will be writing more. I know that doesn't make sense, since all this traveling I've been saying I'm about to be doing, but let me drop some knowledge on you.

Remember the post "And You Thought I Was Single"? Well consider this part two. The first part I wrote about my ongoing unhealthy relationship with food and this time I'm writing about my 10 month relationship with my boyfriend Mark who lives here in California. Yes, I came to California for a boy, and No, I'm not shitting you. I know many of you have probably heard by now and some figured it out on your own and to you I say "well played!". So here's the story.

2 years ago (25 months ago yesterday to be exact) I was on an online forum. A user had made a comment I found to be a bit rude (okay, I called him an ignorant asshole) and the user inboxed me. After a bit of a "disagreement" we couldn't step away from the conversation and the disagreement turned into a 6 hour chat. The chats continued.. for a long time.

His name was Mark (which I kept forgetting and waited about 3 weeks until he mentioned what his name was again) and we were undeniably different. We also had undeniable chemistry pretty early on. By the next month we were texting and by the start of the next year we finally started skyping. We fell into a complicated like for each other before my trip to Central America in 2011 and although we couldn't be together we knew we had something. We planned to see each other at some point but nothing ever worked out right.

After I returned from my trip June of 2011 I wasn't sure where we stood. After the summer though, and through the fall, things heated up again and I could tell I was truly falling for this guy. As complicated as it was, and as much as I never wanted this to happen to me, I was falling in love with a guy over the internet. How the fuck was I going to deal with this one?

Luckily the feelings were mutual. Although it was complicated, by Christmas time we knew what we had and we both felt that we had a sort of commitment to each other - that we might as well be together. So on Dec.30th of 2011 we officially began dating and committing to meeting up in 2012. Fast foward 10 months and I'm finally here in Sacramento at his apartment.

It's a lot to take in and it was hard to tell people. Yes, many people knew, more than I intended (its okay.. I forgive those who spilled the beans lol) and I thank every person who was there for me for the past two years. It was extremely hard trying to maintain a relationship, maintain my privacy and cope with the fact that I felt like a liar and someone who was living a double life. Was I being disrespectful to Mark by telling people I was single? Was my privacy worth the lies I told people about my plans for this trip?

In the end I think everything was worth it. Do I wish Mark and I had met a more simple and less taboo way? Yes, I do. But this is my life now and this is the way it happened and I don't regret any of the past two years or my trip to Sacramento to see him.

Now, I know my friends and family are wondering how I'm doing. I will be totally honest and say it's not perfect but I didn't expect it to be. Mark is great, he's basically just how I imagined him and we've had fun, we've had ups and downs so far, but it's been good. The meet up was awkward for about 5 minutes but we quickly realized hey.. im in love with this person.. im fucking DATING this person.. its us. I was quickly comfortable with him and him with me (as far as I can tell anyway).

So far we've done a lot of just hanging out. He took me to try Sushi which I was so excited about and it was SO good but super filling aha. Last night we went to this little boutique (can we say hipster) where there was a show in the back and it was super cool and right up my alley.

I'm not sure what the future brings for this trip or for my relationship with Mark but that's the point of this trip-to see if we work in real life. I'm excited and nervous and all sorts of feelings. I promise to upload a picture of us as soon as I take on ahah okay Mom?

If you are going nuts and wondering if this is a joke please feel free to comment or inbox me with any questions. To any friends who feel out of the loop and like they should've known - it's not personal. I may have intended to tell you but never had the time alone. I hope everyone can forgive me for being a big fucking liar for two years lol I did what I had to do to protect my privacy and keep people from getting in my shit. People thinking I was a lesbian was enough controversy for me.. I guess this blog blows that rumor right out of the water, doesn't it?

Big love to you all,

Ps. Make sure to vote for Grand Manan's idea in the Aviva Community Fund Contest! If you're from Grand Manan and haven't been voting - shame on you, get to it! To people from far away lands, it would mean a great deal to me and my community if you voted. It would be pretty amazing to win. If you take the time to vote thank you SO much! Just click HERE- all you need is a facebook account and it doesn't post anything to your wall unless you prompt it to. Thanks again.
PPS. The funniest thing about this trip so far is the pack of wild chihuahuas the terrorize the neighborhood we live in. Funny but annoying. Fucking chihuahuas. 

Sunday, October 21


Today is a big day. Today is my last day on Grand Manan (hence the Bye Bye title) before I head out on another adventure and today is my 200th post. I haven't written anything in almost a week and I wasn't even sure I would write today. It's not that I'm giving up on my blog or don't want to write.. I just have a LOT of stuff in my head. When I have a lot of stuff in my head I don't know how to separate and organize the absolute chaos that is my thoughts and look for something worth writing about. I'm going to give it a go though.

I should probably explain where I have been all week. As most of you know I am leaving tomorrow morning for a two month trip to California. This past week I finished up work, started packing and took a trip to the city with my girl friends to have some fun and say goodbyes before I head out. Not only was I busy but my mind was much like it is today - way too full of thoughts to actually sit down and write a well put together blog. Let me tell you about the going away party.

Friday afternoon we all headed out and met in Saint John Saturday Night. A couple of us decided to get a hotel room so that our friends apartments wouldn't get trashed and we would have extra pre-drinking and sleeping space. We paid a super cheap amount for a super disgusting hotel and it definitely showed. When we arrived at the hotel the alarm clock was going crazy, the blankets and pillows were strewn across the room and nothing had been cleaned. Umm - I think the 80$ at least covered a bed that was made. Nasty.

We got a new room and pretty much forgot about that whole situation - I'm not one too make a huge scene about something like that. A new room was a quick fix. We all got ready, had some pre drinks and headed off the main event.

This is the part where you guys have to not judge me for what we did that night, okay? Promise me? We went to a Tila Tequila concert. In the end, we didn't even see a Tila Tequila concert because she was too drunk to perform (if she can even perform anything besides a strip show) and shecame out 20 mins before the club closed. She slurred a bunch of words, asked someone to grab her ass, took pictures with people and left. She didn't perform a single song.

The night was fun though! Being able to get together with a large portion of my girl friends and get crazy was probably worth the 19$ we each paid for a ticket - it was for me anyway. My friend Nat showed up to surprise me on top of the 10ish other girls and the night ended up Pizza and Garlic fingers so I can't really complain. The evening made me realize how badly I will miss everyone while I'm gone. 2 months is not a long time but when you're separated from your friends and family and all the things that make you comfortable it does make it seem a little more complicated. Damn you friends for being so awesome and making it harder to leave!

To be honest I'm totally freaking about leaving - level 10 stress. Well maybe not 10 but a solid 8. When I get there and figure my shit out I will be fine but like I have mentioned I'm a total quack before a trip and I get really anxious and crazy. I will write to you guys as soon as I get there just so you know I didn't lose my mind along the way.

Not a very exciting 200th post but I should sign off and finish packing.
Talk to you all very soon!
Big Love,

Monday, October 15

california waiting.

 I can't believe I am leaving in a week from tomorrow. Well technically I'm leaving in a week but I don't fly out until Tuesday morning. It's crazy and exciting..and crazy. I get really insane before I travel - anxiety must do it. I cry and I change my mind and it's super stressful. I never back out and I never regret not backing out but there's just something about leaving my comfort zone that sets me a bit crazy. I have to give myself credit.. at least I'm leaving the comfort zone.

Jessica, who writes at Fantastically Average, started a new series that I really dig. It's called 5 For Five and basically it's about setting goals for the week and being accountable by writing about them. I figured this was right up my alley this week as I prepare for my trip and it would be a great way to set some goals while traveling and what not. So I decided to link up and I think I will continue to do so while in California.

5 for Five Week 1

1. Start packing for my trip so that I can ....
2.Finish packing for my trip. I know a week is pretty well in advance but this is ME we are talking about..if I don't start soon I will be doing it in the middle of the night before I get on the ferry. For real.
3.. Sort through my make up and beauty products and decide what is nessacary to take. Yes, I take make up when I travel and I try to only take basics but cmon... I do what I want. 
4. Pamper. I know - it sounds odd to do before a trip, I will explain later though. I need my hair died and cut, my eyebrows waxed and a pedicure. After waitressing barefoot in nasty flats all summer my feet are disgusting and smelly. I have bought new shoes but won't wear them until I get these tainted feet fixed up. I need to book these appointments
5. Try not to totally lose my mind.

Pretty easy list. If I can't do these 5 things then I have issues. I can't promise I won't lose my mind though..I may have already lost it. I am excited for my trip though.. this week is just hectic and high anxiety.

What do you guys do to prepare for a trip? Do you get the crazies or is it just me?

Big Love,

Sunday, October 14


It turns out I actually love to read. Sometimes I feel like people look at me as stupid and maybe associate that with not reading but believe me - a lot of dumb asses read ;) This week Sunday Social is about books and I am totally cool with that topic so I'm doing it right now.. at 2am..maybe intoxicated. Link up with Neely and Ashley if you are feelin' Sunday Social this week too.

1.Favorite Childhood Book : Legit book I remember most about my childhood is Happy Birthday, Moon.I still can see every picture and remember reading it so well. It is still on my nightstand beside my bed to be honest, haha. I remember reading that more than anything I think.

2. Favorite Book Lately : Of the last 10 or so books I have read The Book Of Negroes is probably the best. It made me cry and it made me uber depressed but it was definitely the best. If you haven't read it you need to.

3. Book You Wish You Could Live In : I'm reading A Secret Kept and although I wouldn't want it to be my life I wouldn't mind living in Paris to be totally honest. I also wouldn't mind living in the Harry Potter series.

4. If you could be any character from any book who would you be and why? I am totally drawing a blank here. Honestly I read so many depressing books that I would not wish for any of their lives. It would be awesome to be in Harry Potter so I'm going to go with that.. maybe be Hermione. I love Rons character so ending up with him wouldn't be to bad either. :)

5. Favorite book turned movie : Clearly Harry Potter. The movies are absolutely amazing. I love the books more, clearly, but holy.. there are very few things they could have done better with the movies in my opinion.

6.Favorite Magazine : Honestly..Cosmo. I fucking love that shit.

Anyone have any good book recommendations? I have 5 on my night stand in the line up to read but I like.. GOBBLE up books when I travel so I bet I will need some new suggestions asap. Let me know what you're reading!!

Big Love,

Saturday, October 13


& by wiener, I mean winner of my Reader Apprecation Giveaway!
This was so much fun for me so thanks to everyone who played along, entered, spread the word and let me have my week of excitement :) I'm excited to do another in the future. 
Betsy, I emailed you regarding the mailing of your goodies :) 

I just arrived home from a trip to the city with my mama joan to do some shopping and lovely mother daughter bonding before I take off for two months. I spent way too much money, got to see Rach, ate chinese and had an awesome day with my mom. Score! I'm off to get weird with my friends over some beverages so that's all for now!! 
Happy Weekend Everyone! 

Big Love,

Wednesday, October 10

lessons i learn from my friends.

I, like many people, struggle with being insecure. I struggle with looking into the mirror. I struggle with feeling pretty. I struggle with feeling worthy. For a very long time I just wanted to be anybody but me. It was when I started letting my own insecurity affect my friendships that I knew I needed to do some rethinking (because a lobotomy was apparently out of the question).

Through middle school, high school and even after I left GMCS, I wasn't just looking at myself and seeing imperfections- I was always comparing myself. I compared myself to my cousins - I wasn't pretty, skinny, cute and entertaining like they were.I compared myself to my friends because I wasn't beautiful, wealthy, busty, smart and the boys definitely did not want to have movie nights with this girl. I compared myself to older girls at school who walked confidently through the halls and had everyone's attention. As I got older I compared myself to the girls at Student Leadership Conferences I went to - they were so outgoing and made friends so easily and I must not have been interesting enough to fit in there. I compared myself to the girls on opposing Volleyball teams, the other girls backpacking through Guatemala, the girls dancing at bars, the girls at the mall.

I didn't know who I was, or who I wanted to be but I was certain it wasn't me. To me, every girl I saw was a representation of something I was lacking.  This girl had thicker hair, the other girl had a flat stomach, she gets good grades, that girls teeth were straight, these girls were more travel savvy... blah blah blah. And you know what this always led back to? The fact that because of all these things - GUYS were more interested in every girl besides me. I couldn't understand why some desperate pathetic guy out there couldn't just give in and date me.

So for approximately 10 years I was judging myself based on my thoughts of why guys liked other girls. This not only affected the way I thought about myself but it affected the way I thought about my friends and other girls. My comparisons to other girls made me resent them (and worse, my friendships were affected by how I thought boys felt about me)- sort of a "she hates you because she's jealous" deal except I never hated anyone. I had it all wrong.

As I got older, grew up (a little), started losing weight, started finding myself more and started finding my own identity as a woman and a woman who actually might be date-able.... things changed. First off, I realize now that comparing myself to other girls, especially my friends, when it comes to looks is ridiculous. I'm never going to look like them - I'm never going to look like anyone else but me!

Resenting my friends and punishing them for my own insecuries was unfair and wrong. It was not their fault I was insecure and it was not their fault they are smart, beautiful and awesome and boys liked them better than they liked me and better than I liked myself. I could've spent a lot of wasted time learning from my friends and growing from their strengths because I have a really awesome group of girl friends. I should have been trying to become a better me and learning to love myself.

Since this realization I try to not only grow into a better person with the help of my friends but to surround myself with friends who help me grow. I try to surround myself with people who lift me up and who I can do the same thing for. I try to love my friends for the women they are..not dislike them because of my opinion of the woman I am. I have a lot to learn from these women in my life.

Diana brings out my crazy side. She helps me not take myself so seriously. She makes me enjoy life and find a special love for having fun and living life that I can't always find naturally.

Courtney brings out my confident side and reminds me to be real. She has a strong sense of self and makes no excuses for who she is and she helps me be myself and love that person more.

Madeleine brings out my intellectual side and helps remind me that I am not stupid and that I have a voice and she is always there to tell me when I'm making a silly decision. She is definitely the brains of our relationship. She helps me grow into someone I want to be rather then molding me into somebody she wants me to be and I appreciate that friendship so much.

Tamara keeps me strong and cheers me on, she knows me well and has been with me through ups and downs and saw me evolve from a emo caterpillar into who I am now. Her strong will and determination rubs off on me and makes me want to be a machine in all aspects of my life.

Rachel reminds me to love the simple things - family, friends, a nice walk, sitting around enjoying a good visit. She keeps me grounded and reminds me of who I am and where I've been.

All of my friends cheer me on and make me feel good about myself and I truly hope I do the same. When I find myself in a friendship where I don't feel like that's the case, chances are I distance myself from it.

Because of the lessons my friends have taught me, the friendship they have showed me and the faith that they have in me - I know someday I will feel beautiful, I will feel secure in who I am and I will spend my life with someone who treats me with as much love and respect as my friends have shown me. They taught me to expect nothing less. I like knowing that because of who I surround myself with that I am a better person and someday I hope a friend can say that about my friendship. It's a journey, its a battle and it's not easy but self love is important and I plan on finding it.

My point in all of this is to find people who lift you up and don't bring you down. Find people who have the same values as you, find people who open your mind, who raise your spirits and who help you grow. Don't waste your time on people who bring you down or make you feel like you can't be who you are or who you want to be.

& most importantly, always stay true to yourself.

Big Love,

PS. You still have 3 days to enter my READER APPRECIATION GIVEAWAY. Remember that even if you are not an official follower you still get one free vote. Go enter! :)

Sunday, October 7

im not american.

The majority of bloggers (that I follow) are American. Many of the blogs I read are about a lot of American things -restaurants, cities, holidays and people. I, as most of you know, am Canadian and Canada and the US have a lot in common so I blog about a lot of the same things. It seems as though sometimes the blog world is plastered with the same post about Christmas, Valentines Day, Fall, Pumpkin Spice Lattes or New Years Eve. The one privilege I do have as a Canadian blogger is writing about the real thanksgiving - Canadian Thanksgiving!

In November when American Thanksgiving hits there will be a zillion posts about being thankful and turkey but because I'm Canadian and we celebrate on the real day, I get to beat everyone to the punch and write a thanksgiving post first! (Yes, I actually get joy from this) Well, not just me, but all Canadian bloggers, which it seems there are way fewer of. (Shout outs to Georgia and Jenny who are both Canadian and both from NB!)

I like to think of myself as a pretty gracious person and I really dislike entitlement and when people refuse to acknowledge and appreciate all the amazing blessings in their lives. I have written numerous posts about all the things/people I'm extremely  thankful for in  my Too Blessed To be Stressed post, my Supporter post, my post about island life and other posts where I write about that which Im blessed with because I am truly blessed - I really really am. My life is not perfect, and I am not perfect either - I can be selfish and ungrateful- but I don't like to waste time forgetting how awesome life is because you  wanna know how quick everything you have can be taken away from you? Pretty fucking quick.

Today I'm thankful not only for turkey but for always having food (and healthy food!) when I need it.
Today I'm thankful to have parents who have never let me down.
Today I'm thankful for not only my health but my friends and families health.
Today I'm thankful for employment and financial comfort.
Today I'm thankful I was raised to be a hard worker and a dependable employee.
Today I'm thankful for my education. I'm thankful for the opportunity for more. 
Today I'm thankful for honest friends who give me reality checks when I need them.
Today I'm thankful to have a decent head on my shoulders.
Today I'm thankful for accepting and understanding friends.
Today I'm thankful for long chats about life. 
Today I'm thankful for travel opportunity.
Today I'm thankful for being able to laugh my ass off with good friends.
Today I'm thankful for the wonderful weight  loss community on My Fitness Pal
Today I'm thankful for the wonderful blogging community.

& on a final note - because I am so thankful for this blogging community I have the Reader Apprecation Giveaway going on until next weekend so make sure to enter - it's a decent giveaway!

What are you thankful for today whether you are in Canada or abroad? 

Big Love & Happy Thanksgiving,

PS. I don't actually consider Canadian Thanksgiving the real day it's just the term I use with Thanksgiving or when we use Celsius. Its the "real" measurement, people. I'm just being an idiot. - Given the amount of food I plan to gorge on this 
year, I'm not confident in the integrity of this chair's construction.

pps. im gonna eat so much fucking food tonight.

Saturday, October 6

the time has come : GIVEAWAY!

YAY! If you follow me on Instagram or Twitter you may have already seen my late night sneak peak at the giveaway! I just couldn't wait any longer. Today I reached 190 followers and I thought - that's close enough! Plus, if you read this post, you know I was planning to do it early anyway as it is now A Reader Apprecation Giveaway because whether there are 200 of you, 2000 of you or 2 of you - I still love you the same and you make this little blog worth writing! Here's the sneak peak instagram I posted :

Who's excited? I am. I may be the only one but I'm excited enough for the rest of the world so thats fine. Here is a picture of the whole and complete giveaway except tomorrow I will probably shop more and add to it..don't judge me. The two toughest challenges I faced putting this together were a)telling myself I didn't NEED to spend a fortune and b)actually GIVING it away and not keeping it for myself. I went with things I really enjoy because I figure if I enjoyed them, and you read my blog, you might just like them too. If you don't, you probably know someone who you can regift to (I think regifting is the best). So here's what's included :

1. A Cinderella Pez! My favorite disney AND pez? Score!
2.Mulled Cider Candle - I freakin LOVE holiday candles!
3. Maybelline Baby Lips in Peppermint - Literally the best balm I've ever used.
4. Maybelline Color Tattoo In Bad To The Bronze - Love this shit.
5. 4 Mini Polishes from LA Color - These were too cute to resist. I paint my nails way too often.
6. Sweet Tarts. Enough said.
7. Avon Super Shock Max Macara - I'm constantly on the hunt for the perfect mascara! Avon seems like an old lady brand but they seriously have never let me down.
8. $15 Starbucks Gift Card. I originally bought this to be part of a group giveaway but the blogger never got back to me so now you guys get a chance to win it instead! Sounds good to me. 

Just to let you know - the babylips and color tattoo shadow are arriving at my house this weekend aha. So yes, the ones pictured are out of the packaging because they are mine aha. The one's that will be a part of the giveaway will be in their original packaging!

So get entering and then share the love so everyone else can enter as well. Normally if I did a giveaway I would just be like - free for all, everyone enter. This time around I am going to have it more geared towards my actual readers, those who follow me and read my shit. So there is a free vote for whoever but there is also one worth more for my followers. Those are mandatory and unlock the other votes that only those who follow me using Google Friend Connect can enter with - you have way more of a chance to win as an actual follower which is my aim for this giveaway.

Seriously though thank you so much to my readers! You guys rock and get me through all my issues and laugh with me and at me and make blogging even more easy to love. I never would've imagined I would end up with almost 200 followers and people all over the place relating to me and enjoying the shit I write on a daily basis. I also have found so many blogs and amazing bloggers and I hope I get even more immersed into this wonderful world of blogging because it is honestly so fulfilling. This fall I hope for my blog to grow more and to have more time to put into it because I seriously love it and I love it even more because of you guys. So enter this giveaway and get free stuff!! YAY!

Big Love,

Tuesday, October 2

maybe im crazy.

Do you ever do something, think back on it and ask yourself "Am i fucking crazy for doing that?". I mean, we all do crazy shit once in a while but is there an everyday habit you have that others might think is a little kooky? Michelle who writes at The Vintage Apple is asking other bloggers to share things they do that might be considered a little crazy. Here are a few of mine (lets face it, theres a million things I do that make me crazy.

When I go to the bathroom I have to check the toilet for spiders and insects. I have since I was little. I'm afraid they will crawl onto me if I'm on the toilet too long so I only check when I'm going #2. It doesn't even cross my mind if I just have to pee. Does that make me crazy?

When I'm sad or clusterfucky I clean my room and start throwing all my shit out or selling all my clothes. I think it's a way of trying to like refresh my life but it's stupid cause then I end up with an empty closet.Does that make me crazy?

Sometimes if I have a bath I fill the bathtub with super hot water and let the cold water run over my feet. I know it's weird.. like what's the point? Does that make me crazy?

I hold my keys between my hands when walking anywhere in the dark just in case I have to poke anyone's eyeballs out. Does that make me crazy?

At least once a week I drive a few km past my destination before I realize that I fucked up. Does that make me crazy?

I  eat my food in a certain order or in certain combinations. Does that make me crazy?

I can cry over any movie or song. I can go weeks without crying over anything in my own life but hit me with a sad song or a sad movie and I'll be balling. Does that make me crazy? (or much just a pile of emotional wreckage)

When driving onto the ferry (I live on an island for those of you who are new!) I refuse to idle between the ramp and the ferry - my car MIGHT be the car to fall through. Does that make me crazy?

I literally go into attack mode if someone touches my sides or my stomach. It must be an insecurity thing. Does that make me crazy?

I also go into attack mode when people move my shit. If I set something down, I have a plan for it, don't fucking move it. Does that make me crazy? and a little aggressive?

I love me some raspberry jam on a grilled cheese. Does that make me crazy? 

I can't wear watches and bracelets unless its a homemade bracelet and light. I hate having weight on my wrists and that sort of shit is always getting in the way. Does that make me crazy?

I have an emotional attachment to my car hence why I put thousands of dollars into a piece of shit car. I would drive a cavalier forever. Does that make me crazy?

Comment and let me know what makes you crazy..that is if you haven't taken off already because I'm ridiculous.

Big love,


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